


Coming out?

by KristinaR415



Category: Original Work
Genre: Age Difference, Coming out?', Epiphany?, Gay Club, High School, Homophopic opinions, M/M, Underage - Freeform, conflicting emotions, confused
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-29
Updated: 2017-12-29
Packaged: 2019-02-23 13:41:29
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,682
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13191285
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/KristinaR415/pseuds/KristinaR415
Summary: Matthew went through puberty differently than his friends, who made it obvious that they are homophobic, so he definitely had some thinking to do about his preference...





	Coming out?

High school was an okay place to be for me. I was doing good in class, maybe better than most, but that wasn’t important to me, it just happened by itself. I did my homework, I did my assignments and I did well. I wasn’t one of the popular boys, but I wasn’t a total nerd either, so I also had lots of time to hang out with my friends, which I liked doing. It was mostly the boys, but there were also some girls who I enjoyed the company of. That sadly didn’t last long, because it started to change when puberty hit me and the surrounding students.

The boys started to look closer at the cheerleaders and called them hot. They stared at their chest region, also referred to as boobs or breasts and talked about them like they meant the world. While I’d rather stare at the football captain and call him hot and look at his muscles flex when he trained or ran or moved really, oh and his ass, because that flexed too and looked so delicious when he moved, which sounded unnatural, so I never let it slip that I felt like that, plus everyone else liked to stare at someone of the opposite sex, so it didn’t feel normal for me to look at the same sex.

The girls looked at me differently after that period hit us and it just wasn’t the same, so, therefore, I stopped hanging out with most of them, but some still came around sometimes, the ones who didn’t see me as a completely different person. I liked hanging out with those girls, they were sweeter than the boys and they would rather talk than play sports, which I’d never really liked. I preferred to sit on the sidelines and just watch the boys play rather than playing myself. I was never one for being sweaty and gross, but the other boys seemed to enjoy it and so did the girls, which I must say that I didn’t get until they started taking their shirts off and you could see their stomach and pectoral muscles glistening, which looked hot, but you’d never get me to say it aloud, because that would make them think that I’m gay, so they’d probably stop talking to me, or rather they definitely would, because they sometimes bully other boys that they think could be gay or that they know are gay. Therefore, I’m not gonna talk about it, because all my friends had expressed their disgust of gay people not long after discovering the glory of girls, so that’s why I didn’t tell anyone about my feelings or who I was looking at, because I didn’t want to lose their love and of course my parents agree with my friends on that topic and they always say that Satan created gay people and that they will join him once they die.

When I turned 16, the boys wanted to go out and celebrate, of course, we weren’t old enough, but that was taken care of by some fake id’s, which got us into a club that turned out to be a gay one, but the boys decided that they could endure one night of being surrounded by gay couples, plus they could have fun dancing, drinking, and making fun of the gay couples doing the same thing, so they did just that. Of course, they were a bit sad, that they wouldn’t be able to bring anyone home, but it seemed like they had had a fun time anyway.

I decided to just stay at the bar instead of joining them because I didn’t want to make fun of the couples on the dancefloor. I got a drink and was enjoying it until a man suddenly sat next to me and by 'man' I meant over 18 and legal. He ordered a drink while I sneaked a look at him out of the corner of my eye, he had brown hair, light brown, green sparkling eyes, full lips, a nice manly chin, and his upper body looked well-trained as did the rest of his body and I could almost feel myself drooling, so I looked away as to not give away too much.

“Like what you see, handsome?” the man suddenly asked and that startled me out of my thoughts about the wrongness of my feelings. I didn’t really know what to say. “Well, any man can enjoy a well-trained body, can’t they?” I asked, and he shrugged “they can, but you do know that you’re at a gay bar, right?” he asked and turned to look at me with his eyebrows raised. I looked around for a bit and saw a lot of same-sex couples dancing and kissing. “I certainly do, but my friends brought me here to celebrate my birthday, they just didn’t see that it was a gay bar, so…” I said and shrugged. “You just looked like someone that belongs here, so I assumed…” the man said and gestured to the dancefloor. “I’ve certainly looked at my share of males and enjoyed it quite a bit, so perhaps I do belong. Why did you think that?” I asked and turned to look at him with a questioning look “just the way you sit and the way you look. Few men tend to wear floral shirts” he said and pointed to my obviously unmanly shirt that I decided to wear today. “Well, I like it, and some men can wear something like that when they feel comfortable in their manliness” I said defiantly, very proud of myself, “usually they wear it when they’re comfortable in their unmanliness” he corrected and that might be right, but I wouldn’t call myself feminine or unmanly. “Are you calling me feminine?” I asked, a little offended “It’s not a bad thing, I like it when my men are feminine” he said and winked at me, which in turn made me blush and question my own point in this argument, because was it so wrong to be a bit feminine? Then I remembered my friends, who would certainly make fun of me if I wore something like that to school, and they had only approved the shirt for clubbing because they said it would get the girls. 

“I usually don’t wear stuff like this. I just discovered it in the back of my closet and wanted to try it on before deciding if I wanted to keep it or throw it out” I said, and he seemed a bit surprised “throw it out? It’s so damn pretty on you. So, I would advise you to not throw it out” he said and leaned towards me. “Pretty?” I asked and blushed “you don’t like it?” he asked and quirked an eyebrow “on the contrary, I love it. No one’s ever called me that before” I said “well, stay here and I’ll call you pretty all night” he said and pulled away from me. “Where are your friends?” he suddenly decided to ask, “on the dancefloor, dancing, drinking, and making fun with the couples, because they despise gay people” I said and rolled my eyes “of course, that must be why you don’t seem comfortable with the prospect of being gay yourself” he said aloud, pondering to himself, with his hand thoughtfully on his chin. “Perhaps,” I said and after a quiet, or not quite quiet we were still in a club, few minutes, I asked, “are you here alone?” “Nope, I went here with some friends. They’re out there too, dancing and kissing and stuff” he answered while nodding towards the dance floor, “gay, too?” I asked, and he just nodded “two girls, sweet and very loving” he answered “nice” I said, and we went into an awkward silence that was so thick that it could be cut with a knife, which was sad, because he seemed like a great guy to talk to and he wasn’t too bad to look at either.

The silence had been dragging on for a long time, so I decided to look for my friends to see if they had any fun, but I couldn’t see them anywhere until the man beside me pointed towards some guards that were escorting some guys out of the club “are those your friends?” he asked. I squinted my eyes and widened them afterwards in surprise because it was my friends, they had probably defended someone. I sighed “they probably made someone mad. Maybe I should go find them” I said, finished my drink, and gestured to the bartender, but the man stopped me “it’s on me,” he said and paid for my drink “thanks,” I said while my cheeks heated up. I got up, but the man suddenly grabbed my arm, spun me around and kissed me. It was so sudden and so quick that I didn’t have any time to react before it was over, but I had widened my eyes in surprise anyways, and he had put something in my back pocket. “I never introduced myself, pretty boy. My name’s Aidan” he said, “Matthew, friends call me Matt” I said per reflex because I was still very stunned. “Well, hope to see you again, Matthew,” he said and left the bar. I wanted to leave too, but I just stood there, still feeling his lips on mine. The kiss had been short, but amazing.

Suddenly I found myself staring at a rainbow flag, knowing exactly what it stood for. It also got me thinking about myself and who I was. I wasn’t the manliest, the strongest or the highest boy, but I realized exactly why, the moment Aidan kissed me. I wasn’t like the other boys, I was like Aidan and therefore I reached into my back pocket and saw a piece of paper with a number written on it. He had given me his number! I knew it was wrong because my parents and friends didn’t like homosexuals, but I didn’t care. The number would definitely be put to good use.

**Author's Note:**

> I might make this into a bigger Malec fic, because I've fallen for that pairing too and it just seemed like something that could happen between them.


End file.
